you really can't compare to anyone else. even though a lot of people are a million times better than you. i miss everything about you. i miss the beginning of it all. you're so different than everyone else out there and i just can't seem to let go. i want to be friends, not lovers. lovers causes too much pain and numbness which is unhealthy for a girl like me. i hate walking past you and just ignoring you but i'm too scared to actually say a simple hi, let along a full conversation. i'm really happy for the both of us and how everything has worked out though i still wish we were friends and you won't allow it. i'd really like being friends with you, our friendship was better than anything we ever had.
i miss all the memories we had. they're fading away and i'm slowly deleting everything that has ever existed between us because i'm good at deleting my past. i held on to you for too long and now i can't hold onto anyone at all, because of you.
i was comparing you to someone today and it was weird. you're not in my life and the other person is and i started to cry because i miss you so much and how you are so different to him. it made me really sad and now i'm starting to push that person away which is terribly. i can feel in my heart that he's still with me though my mind wants him gone but i'm not allowing myself to lose anyone else because it's not necessary for myself to be doing this.
i really want you to come out and see me one day, we need to catch up and create some more memories, before we forget each other.
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